"don't move, DON'T MOVE!"

I was going to post something lighthearted today. Something fun. And then, on the way to meeting a 2013 Bride, something happened that completely altered the course of the day. I'm embarrassed to admit that I was irritated about something, and so I was arguing a little with my mom (not terribly, but I wasn't in the best mood). I was worried I was going to be late. And then, two cars in front of us, a car hit the shoulder, spun around a couple times in the middle of traffic, and hit the median. The moment is sticky in my brain. I saw swirls of dust and saw the car spinning spinning spinning and it felt like an awful movie. My mom yelled, "don't move, don't move!" twice, and I sat there waiting for the car to hit us, waiting for something to happen. She slammed the brakes and two cars skidded by us, almost hitting us, and a red van stopped by the girl's car to block traffic. The man in the car and my mom ran out to help her, and I sat very still. No one was hurt, which was a miracle, but the whole experience was terrifying. I called the sweet Bride I was meeting up with and told her what had happened, and immediately after, burst out crying. The man behind us drove a semi and stopped after we did, and if he didn't, we would have been hit.

the accident is fresh in my brain and I'm still shaky and scattered from it, but I am so grateful for life.

it's crazy to think that if we had left five minutes later, five minutes earlier, or had done one thing different, everything would have changed. how everything that happened happened in a split second, in a blink of an eye. and then how we drove away and life went on. I watched cars and wondered how they could keep moving. didn't they know what was going on? didn't they know that people could have been hurt or worse?

and it made me think about life. about tragedies happening everywhere and how we DON'T notice. how awful things, painful things, hard things, horrific things, sobering things happen everyday, everywhere, and we're either unaware or too self-preoccupied to notice or care. and i thought about how if one person had done something differently, if the car behind us hadn't stopped, if we had been hit, how our entire day and possibly our lives would be different. how fragile and precious life truly is. and how much we take it for granted. people say that all the time, but until you're in an instance where you have no control and don't know the outcome, you don't realize how beautiful and blessed you are.

my whole body is out of whack from it and i have an awful headache, but i'm here, sitting on my couch, writing. and i had a wonderful meeting with kelly (one of the brides i'm shooting next year). and for lunch, i had squash with butter and brown sugar and an egg with cheddar cheese. and i came home to see the pumpkin papers the littles had made as crafts and i got hugged and loved on by all of them.

freeways freak me out a little bit though.

but i'm here and i'm grateful for life.